Journal

Purpose: To write my thoughts of the day if I feel that it is important or worth value.

Return to Main Page.

Summer 2019 Archive

Spring 2019 Archive

Winter 2019 Archive

2019.02.07: It has been a long time since I have last written in my journal. I have become lazy and not wanting to put in the effort as much as I have wanted to before. There is so much that I can write about but I always put it off because of the amount of time and effort it takes to finally be done.

...But today I was inspired by my Lyft driver to start writing again today. Today I was actually on my way to fly to Guam where my US Naval aicraft carrier awaits me for a long and upcoming deployment of 5 1/2 months long. Unfortunately, the morning flight was cancelled due to bad weather which messed up all of my other connecting flights. Due to my anxiety and lack of knowledge, I was unnecessarily very stressed over something that was a simple fix and no big deal. I boarded my morning flight and immediately started listening to music. An hour has passed and I was somewhat tired and asleep but I noticed that the plane has not even taken off yet. Not much longer after we went back to the airport terminal we came from and the flight was cancelled. Everyone was waiting in line for a flight attendant to rebook or reimburse flights. I was one of the last people in the line since I had to go to the restroom. I have waited for over 2 hours and finally got to the flight attendent only to tell me that my flight tickets were invalid which was really defeating. I had to call my chief petty officer up to update him on my situation. He suggested that I call CWTSatoTravel which is one of the easiest ways to get my flight rebooked. I did that and the guy helping me out said that the earliest time I will arrive in Guam was on February 10 which would have been the time when the ship I was supposed to go on would have departed. My chief told me to call them again to confirm and I had a different person helping me saying that the airline should be the ones rebooking my flights. I exited the security check area and went back to the booking area but this time they were able to rebook my flights. It turns out that government funded flights have a different locator number than standard personal booked flights which is why the flight attendant before said they were invalid. My flight has sucessfully been rebooked to fly out tomorrow but one of my connecting airlines was in Tokyo, Japan which I thought would have been a problem without a passport which I didn't have yet. Turns out that I just needed my 'travel orders' which I didn't really know was a thing. As long as you have them printed out then you can go to wherever you want no problem. I didn't have those in the first place so in a way it was a good thing that I never flew today.

After updating my Chief about the situation again I just needed to print out my travel orders and go back to the airport tomorrow morning. I needed a ride back to the base. Recently I have been calling up the same Lyft driver because I really like talking to her. She was a woman in her early to mid 40s that was very talkative and always tries to be positive. If I had used Lyft to book a flight back to base it would have been $51 but she only charged me $40 in cash after hearing the story of my day today. I should have ordered via Lyft because it was a reimbursable charge for official travel but she deserves the cash and I didn't care that much. When we talk she would always describe me as patient and calm which I think I can understand from her viewpoint. More than anything today I was stressed and worried but I acted like it wasn't a big deal when I told her about my cancelled flight. We talk about a lot of things during the long drive... superheroes, the corona virus, Trump being acquitted, her being a book author, how she regrets some of her life decisions, etc... She is a very good talker. What inspired me to write again was when she said it was a good idea to write a journal for your future children or loved ones so they can read about you back in those days. I don't know if I will ever fall in love with a woman and have children but it was a really beautiful thought to me. They would learn to know what I do, how I felt about things, my thoughts on whatever, many things... I also thought that I could look back in the past about how I was back then as well. When we got back to base she said that I was a very good talker. Truthfully I am very socially awkward and quiet unless I talk to extroverted people I notice. I told her that I can only talk like this because of extroverted people herself and she understood. I really enjoyed her company driving me back to the base and I hope I get to see her again in about 6 months. When I get a car I think I will ask to be friends with her. Just like my Japanese coworker said in the past - I think I can become friends with anyone regardless of age. It didn't matter if my Lyft driver was 40 or 70 - She was a very enjoyable person to talk to and I'd like to associate with her if I could.

I have picked up learning Japanese who knows how many times now... but this time I have reached the farthest I have ever made it so far. Definitely not impressive if seen by other people but it makes me happy that I have finally been self-motivated enough to keep going. Since I was going to be stuck on the ship for 5 1/2 months with very little things to do - It was a perfect opportunity to learn and study the Japanese language. When most of your hobbies are literally from Japan for literally almost half your life - Theres no excuse not to learn the language anymore. This is something that I must do because I know that it will make me happy when I can finally understand without needing the help of translations all the time. I have been trying to learn it for many years but have always gave up from low self-motivation. Having randomly stumbling upon itazuraneko's neocities website - It is if not one of the best Japanese language learning resources you'll ever find. The fact that it has many guides, resources, RAW source material, and even a fully and publicly available site backup on MEGA is amazing. I can download the website and view it entirely offline while I was on the ship. This meant a lot to me. I have been learning about 20 Japanese words a day and been doing pretty well until recently. The problem is that I am having a hard time remembering certain vocabulary readings/meaning. Learning via pure rote isn't such a great idea but I want to do it until I atleast get to 1000 vocabulary words then start reading source material. I'm not comfortable of the idea of having to look up everything extremely often in the beginning. After I get to my goal of 1k vocabulary words I will still my own mining deck while continuing to do Core 2k/6k Anki flashcards. The hardest thing about doing Anki flashcards everyday for me was the amount of time it would take and the amount of cards that would keep showing up in my deck for review. Its not actually hard at all especially when you have several hours of free time everyday. You just have to set a routine to cut yourself off from the world with no distractions and you can focus for an hour or less. Its so simple that I can't believe I thought it was hard.

Also because I am going to be on the ship for 5 1/2 months I thought it was a good idea to pick up reading manga again. It is, if not, the easiest entertainment medium to get into. It doesn't take a lot of time like movies and TV series does and its not as dry and boring as books which makes it very easy to consume. I can read it when I'm not busy at work and it doesn't feel like as much of a chore compared to when I watch anime. It is widely more produced since it can be worked on by a single person, the author/artist. I used to actually read a lot of manga maybe 6-7 years ago but suddenly stopped. Not sure why. Reading the few series I have picked up so far: Tsuredure Children is one of the most enjoyable romcoms. Ever. Its so cute and innocent that it will always put a smile on yourself and laugh. Kiryuin Kaya Chi o Suwareru Dake no Kantan na Oshigoto was an okay series. Felt short and incomplete. Same thing with Ore no Himegutsu wo Haitekure but it left me even more disappointed. Renai Shimasen ka? was the opposite of these despite being short. I loved the morals in it and the romance overall as well. Love Rush is short as well but the ending was kind of depressing and heartaching but in a good way. I've noticed now that I am far more critical of manga than anime so far. I know that a lot of people have issues with anime but manga is easier for me to spot the issues I guess. I'll start archiving manga in my NAS now and reading some in my free time. I've been wanting to write my impressions on certain series or episodes for a while now so maybe sometime in the future.

Something that I probably shouldn't really talk about but will do anyway. I have been feeling the doujin music community divide more than ever now. In Doujinstyle, despite having over 15k+ people, not many people talk at all which I can imagine is due to the aggressiveness of the active users. The owner and mods don't really seem to care about quality control as long as its not a transcode. While collecting rips just for better .logs is autistic I do encourage proper ripping practices. You'll just be shunned and made fun of about it and it causes dumb drama so its not worth talking about. The old sekret chink club server I used to be in... It was pretty sad to leave. I was somewhat depressed for two days. We used to be so active and chat everyday about whatever and share our CD rips all the time but things have changed for the worse... The chink forums are not active anymore and not really even worth using anymore except for old resources which most of the download links have already expired. Everybody is talking in their own communities these days and it just feels so empty. Just because I like the 2nd Doujin Music server that is, in many ways, a lot better than any of the doujin music servers I feel ostracized by the very people that I've known for 4 to 6 years. Right now I still only regularly talk to two of them but don't really care about the others anymore.. It didn't make sense to stay there any longer and I didn't want to associate with them anymore so I put an end to it. I am much more comfortable with a community that is a lot more helpful, caring, and talkative than the people from the past. Goodbye old friends.